We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize