at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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