woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
that's an acceptable place to lick
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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