tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
