watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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