shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Randomize