Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
