It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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