The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
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