i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
