So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize