do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
