dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
