dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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