I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I have feelings that need drinking.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
