the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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