yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
