have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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