Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
