My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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