I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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