i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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