This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
