I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Randomize