erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
