I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
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