Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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