You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
