she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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