Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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