No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
