Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
