I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Randomize