nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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