I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize