Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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