Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize