WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize