I wanna passion pit in your ass
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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