Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
