Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
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