i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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