Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
