Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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