Well douche your snatch and let's go!
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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