I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
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