i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize
