I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize