Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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