Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
