please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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